Just wanted to do a quick post on last week’s tutorial for the Research Paper. Unfortunately, due to traffic, I wasn’t able to attend the tutorial, but instead managed to do it on loudspeaker in the car from Vauxhall Bridge to Camberwell.
From what was said, the feedback was positive, though there’s still a lot of work to be done. My argument, and particularly my abstract need to be whittled down to its key points. I naturally have a tendency to waffle, so trimming the fat on the paper will be my focus over the next few weeks. Having read a previous version of the essay, it already contains only half of the sources it originally did….. Some of these sources I’m not sure why i even read them in the first place.. Richard Dawkins isn’t the most inspiring writer.
During the research period, I read far beyond my subject and naturally tried to include these sources into my argument. It wasn’t until I read through that i realised how diluted the core question had become. I took my scissors to the essay and produced the first draft, which, after speaking with Gareth, still needs to be set in the right direction.
The first section looks into the evolution of Paik’s TV Buddha, and more specifically its ability to question the ever-evolving relationship between user and device. I’m happy with how this has gone, however the remaining sections begin to tail off. Considering this, I’m going to focus more on the implications of Paik’s Buddha, rather than the slightly questionable sections that followed.
Overall, Gareth seemed happy with the quality of the writing and the basis of the question, the main issues seemed to be in solidifying the argument. He suggested that this would come from re-organising the abstract. At the moment, my abstract is 800 words long….. Gareth suggests it should be around 3/400.. So… here lies the problem, I’m trying to pack too much into a 4000 word essay… Standard over-thinking things.
I’m continuing my work on the essay, as I don’t want to lose momentum, and it needs to be finished! However, as Jonathan said, I will be focussing more of my time on making work, and getting prepared for the Unit 1 Assessment.